This article is for anyone wanting to take control of their life and create a life they love, enjoy and are inspired by. A life that is truly beautiful!!
ACTION #4: SELF-LOVE
Are you a people-pleaser?
Do you feel unfulfilled or Like your needs are not being met?
wondering when you might find someone to love & appreciate you?
I have the solution for you, it's you!
why you need to LOVE & prioritise yourself
I have always been a people pleaser. I love doing things for people. I love making others feel welcome and love to forget about all of my own needs in the process. For a long time I thought that my lack of fulfilment was because other people were forgetting my needs and I thought it was a good thing that my needs were not being met. By my being selfless I was making the world a better place because I was giving my time and energy to others. Being selfish is always bad, right?! Wrong!!
This all changed when I learned that I am 100% responsible for feeling loved, for being fulfilled and for ensuring that my needs are being met. I realised that in order to prioritise my needs I had to be “selfish” and no one wants to be…selfish!
Being selfish when it comes to making sure your needs are being met is not only a good thing for yourself and your own development, but a massive plus for all those around you.
This is because without filling up our own cup with lots of love, you will not have enough love to give others. It will always run out, deplete, you will burn out! So, we need to fill ourselves up with so much love that we are brimming with the stuff and therefore have more to give others. You do this by showing yourself acts of love and prioritising your needs, as if you would for a dear friend or family member.
what does it look like making sure your needs are being met?
You look after your body by eating healthy, nutritious food and making time for movement, you remind yourself that you love and appreciate yourself every day and you make time for the activities that light you up and make you feel good and inspired.
Who knew that by making time to take care of your needs, you would actually set about in making the world a better place?! Win-win!
Action #4 to Create a Life that is Beautiful
This week we have 2 actions which will help you show yourself some love.
First, I want you to look at yourself in the mirror at least once every day and say to yourself “I love myself” 10 times with a smile. Look into those beautiful, gorgeous eyes and say it proudly. I LOVE MYSELF!
Second, I want you to schedule one activity every single day that is just for you (this will be ideally for at least an hour and as a minimum 15 minutes).
Can’t think of what that could be? It could be anything! Just do one thing just for yourself every single day that brings you joy and see how others reap the benefits of having a more loving you around!
If you are still struggling to find activities which will bring you joy, then think of things you used to enjoy doing as a kid and give them a go. Here are some examples:
- journal your feelings
- take a dance class
- go for a run
- do a yoga session
- do some painting
- read a book
- have a nap
- get a massage
- have a bath
- make a delicious & healthy snack.
On episode #199 of The Lively Show, Jess gave such a wonderful anecdote about a woman she encountered on a retreat. The woman was having a strong emotional reaction to a vision she was experiencing during the retreat. After, she shared that during the vision, it was really scary and she felt so alone. She said she wanted someone to hold her hand, however.... then she realised that she had 2 hands all along and could hold her own hand! She realised she could help herself. She could give herself the loving hand she needed all along.
I thought this story was so beautiful when I heard it and often re-listen to this part of the episode when I need a loving reminder. It is so easy to forget that we always have ourselves to take care of us. That we can always rely on ourselves, especially when we are used to letting ourselves down all the time.
For me, I know that in order to function in the real world I need "me time" every single day. I also know that if I don't have time to set myself up with healthy food and do some daily movement, I get cranky. And don't even mess with my morning routine.... because I will do everything I can to protect that time! When either my partner or I are in a funk or feeling down, our first question is now to ask: what do you need? We ask this not with the intention of being the one to provide whatever the other needs, but as a reminder that its time to check in and identify what it is you need and make time for that.
How do you show yourself love?
Placing your needs into your own hands gives you all the power. All needs are important, no matter how silly they might seem and you do the people around you a disservice when you forget to make time to fulfil those needs. This is a display of self-love and ensures that you are around as a fully functioning, loving human in your interactions with the people around you.
So lovely people, this week please don’t let yourself down, instead prioritise your needs and take some "me time" by completing the 2 exercises at Action 4 above. If nothing else doing this will immediately bring you more purpose and fulfillment in your life. It will also make you feel more loved, joyful and inspired. Take action today my lovelies!
Let me know how you get on with this activity this week. Tell me how you are going, whether you are struggling with anything and how you are feeling. I want to hear it all. If you have a private question, please feel free to get in contact by email or direct message. I care and I appreciate you!
And of course, if you would like to share this article with any friends you think might resonate with the content please share this article with them too.
You are worthy and wonderful, with so much to contribute to the world! We all have unique skills, abilities and interests and I wholeheartedly believe that by embracing those, finding your platform and choosing love, joy and inspiration along the way you make the world a better place. :-)
Join me next week for Action #5 which is all about slowing doooowwwwwnnnnn. Make sure you don't miss out by subscribing to receive my weekly newsletter below.
Lots of love,